Definition of Workplace Bullying

DEFINITION:
Workplace Bullying is repeated, health-harming mistreatment of one or more persons (the targets) by one or more perpetrators that takes one or more of the following forms:
*Verbal abuse

*Offensive conduct/behaviors (including nonverbal) which are threatening, humiliating, or intimidating

*Work interference — sabotage — which prevents work from getting done
http://www.workplacebullying.org/individuals/problem/definition/
"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself.”
~Harvey S. Firestone

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Dr. Jekyll appears more clearly

Where to begin, hmmm?It is almost one year to the date I had a personal encounter with Dr. Jekyll.  Here a glimpse of  the "craziness" created by Dr. Jekyll.  Trying to keep these blogs as neutral as possible, not giving exact dates, times and places or situations.  So, here is how the story began.  I had asked off of work for a specific date about a month in advance and was given the green light by the bullying boss.

First, I need to back up a week earlier from my approved day off.  My family had a big function going on and the bullying boss was invited, along with members of his/her family.  At one point during this function, a conversation took place regarding needing to make sure there was coordination of some items prior to my vacation day, vacation weekend.  Yes, the bullying boss, along with a member of his/her family and one from my family discussed the items and when I would need to get them.  The bullying boss knew clearly the date I was taking my vacation day, I was going to get these needed items from him/her.

"Craziness" inserted, Dr. Jekyll appears.  As I was driving on my vacation day, I receive an email from bullying boss and the nightmare begins.  In his/her email she/he asks where I am and that she/he was told by other employees that I was taking the day off.  I emailed him/her back, explained this was approved by him/her and I was over 5 hours away from home.  His/her response was I just did not show up for work, blah blah blah.  I was really offended and could not believe this was happening.  I had never not just showed up for a job, was frantic and if I would of been closer to home, would of turned around, canceled my plans and went to work.  In the meantime, I called another employee to get a better understanding of the severity of my situation.  Sadly, Dr. Jekyll already struck and made it well know in the office that I had not shown up for work and there was no previous knowledge of my vacation day (this was confirmed by others in the office too).  I was beside myself, professionally and personally, the picture the bullying boss had painted was in no way apart of my character.

I vented for a while to my husband/wife and when I arrived at my destination took a moment to respond to his/her email.  In the email I responded in a professional manner, offering my apologizes for any misunderstanding and (knowing he/she already gossiped about me to other employees) explained the importance of my professional image to an employer and co-workers.  You will be surprised, Dr. Hyde showed up for a brief moment and sent an email response everything was fine, blah blah blah.  I knew his/her pattern of gossiping about his/her employees and knew my name was being trashed.  I was deeply insulted and hurt.  Looking back, had the bullying boss NOT gossiped about his/her thoughts to my co-workers and lied..

If you have been bullied you understand and can relate to the Dr. Jekyll persona trashing my reputation.  Everything I have read about bullies goes right to this point, they are not ethical people and if they are feeling threatened or are not the center of attention (narcisstic personality disorder), they are going to create "craziness".  As I wrote before, he/she was experiencing a pregnancy and with it came insecurity and uncertainty for him/her.  Keep in mind, the bullying boss was not happily married, at least the daily trashing of his/her husband/wife would lead one to believe this to be true.  Looking back and realizing a bully or someone who suffers from narcissitic personality disorder is a very insecure, unhappy and ugly person.  Maybe he/she was the only problem in the troubled marriage.  I just had a analytical thought, can you visualize this in an office week after week, month after month...

The bullying boss would put the wrath of the Dr. Jekyll on his/her husband/wife this week and the next week, yes I am not exaggerating, the next week Dr. Hyde would appear and they would be making out in his/her office.  Just another realization of how sick the bullying boss was!

And so, the beginning of my nightmare begins

Watch for the signs,

Targeted

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