Definition of Workplace Bullying

DEFINITION:
Workplace Bullying is repeated, health-harming mistreatment of one or more persons (the targets) by one or more perpetrators that takes one or more of the following forms:
*Verbal abuse

*Offensive conduct/behaviors (including nonverbal) which are threatening, humiliating, or intimidating

*Work interference — sabotage — which prevents work from getting done
http://www.workplacebullying.org/individuals/problem/definition/
"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life, but define yourself.”
~Harvey S. Firestone

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Making a difference

Like I said in my previous blog, I was going through some paperwork, found a number of emails and cards from clients and also a beautiful keepsake.  It brought a smile to my face and reminded me of how much I liked my job.  Liking my job has made this experience that more difficult.  I enjoyed the population I worked with and the rewards which were accomplished. 


As I read through the emails and cards, I was reminded of a husband and wife I met at a meeting.  Their situation still tugs at my heart.  The husband had just been diagnosed with cancer and needed some guidance.  His financial situation was a little shaky and asked if I was able to help.  The gentleman did not believe he had many  options and never knew of the options I offered to him.   Long story short, I was able to resolve his dilemma and he was able to continue his medical care, financially save him money and most importantly gave him piece of mind. Reading his card reminded me of his appreciation for the help I gave to him.  


Then underneath the card, I came across a box, a little blue box with a little saying on it. This gift was given to me by the bullying box just a few months prior to becoming his/her target.   

                                                    Making a Difference
An old man walked up a shore littered with thousands of    starfish, beached and dying after a storm.  A young man was picking them up and flinging them back into the ocean"Why do you bother?"the old man scoffed. "You're not saving enough to make a difference."The young man picked up another starfish and sent it spinning back into  the water."Made a difference to that one," he said. 
           You make a difference, everyday
                                                   
                                                                                
(Inside the box was a pretty glass piece with a starfish inside and the saying Making a Difference)


I think it is in these keepsakes from my job I am the most upset.  I know I was making a difference in my work and with people I was working with.  I went the extra mile when others did not and in my heart it is the way I always worked.  


The question in my mind, "How does the bullying boss go from giving a keepsake so beautiful to trying to destroy my health, my financial situation and a job I loved?"  I wonder the true intention of these nice gestures and wholeheartedly know now these were with manipulative intentions.  Through the four months I suffered with the bullying bosses abuse, the message was clear...conform to my ways or I will destroy you regardless of the work you do, its my way or the highway, I am the boss and I am in control.  


As I blog and refer to research written about bullies, their behavior is evil and deceitful.  The stories the bullying boss must have told to sell others on how terrible I was as an employee.  And to think some believe and continue to believe the lies.  


To the bullying boss, maybe you need to look deep inside of your empty soul and drag your drama, attention seeking, narcissistic self to a good counselor.  

To myself, continue to make a difference and know good always conquers evil...Survivor!                                                                                                                                                       

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