I do not want anyone to believe I am making a direct parallel between bullies and what happened during Hitler's reign as being any where on the same level. What happened during Hitler's reign is deplorable beyond words.
My intention is to make others think about their experiences with a bully, whether being bullied yourself or watching someone being bullied. As I have written in previous blogs, bystanders can actually encourage the bullies behavior by their inaction's. I ask each of you to look at the pattern, when the bully speaks listen to what they are saying, how they gossip, speak of others negatively and has a way of painting a picture of life that is grand or drama drama every where has been encompassing their world. Keep in mind, it is never drama they caused but drama everyone else has set in their laps. Keep in mind the characteristics and patterns a bully possess, along with the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde persona. Most bullies are narcissistic, are likable and have charisma and that is why anyone can get caught off guard.
Each of us has a choice, to stand up and let the bully know you are no longer going to be a part of their gossiping ways or their destructive behavior. No longer encouraging them with sympathy for their song and dance about how they are being wronged or victimized. I would like to believe as adults one could decipher truths laid out in front of them. Its a simple picture, if you know someone that gossips about everyone, week in and week out, has some type of drama, such as I am sick, everyone is sick again, someone is stupid, everyone is stupid, so and so wronged me, and on the other extreme end, look at me, what a good person I am, I am opinionated, I am all this and that, example of Dr. Jekyll and Dr. Hyde persona. Remember a bully wears both faces and just like stated previously, if you think for one minute they have not gossiped about you or would not turn on you, think again!
The pattern is clear, their pattern is clear if you just care to look.
The campaign by Gary and Ruth Namie to establish laws to prevent being bullied in the workplace in the healthy workplace bill. Whether you choose to actively get involved in the campaign or decide you are no longer going to be inactive against a bully, progress has been made.
The following is a strong statement made by "German Pastor Martin Niemoller visited the former Dachau concentration camp, where he had been imprisoned from 1941 to April 1945. His November 1945 diary entry and some subsequent speeches he gave imply that that visit triggered the though that became this famous quotation" (http://www.history.ucsb.edu/faculty/marcuse/niem.htm).
First they came for the communists, and I did not speak out--
because I was not a communist;
Then they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out--
because I was not a socialist;
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out--
because I was not a trade unionist;
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out--
because I was not a Jew;
Then they came for me--
and there was no one left to speak out for me.
Its a powerful quotation. To be inactive is to feed the bully's sense of themselves. Keep in mind a person who is a bully, narcissistic is not going to change because you speak out but it might slow their progress. The less people being active around them, the better for all. And you have distanced yourself from becoming a victim of their bullying.
So, to do nothing?
Another point in the lies of deception blog to follow, stay tuned!